Oh, Arizona... Why? WHYYY?

This week, Arizona joined my shortlist of states that we could do without. Yep, that's right, Arizona has been put up on the same pedestal as Florida and Texas. Congratulations, Arizona, you've really earned it.

First up is their immigration bill. You'd have to be hiding under a rock to not have heard about it, but if you haven't, I'll give you a quick lesson.

Arizona's new anti-illegal-immigration bill law^[1] requires legal immigrants to carry papers on them at all times. That's fine, probably even reasonable - but also not the issue. The issue is much larger than that: the law gives police the authority to simply ask to see someone's ID if the officer suspects someone of being an illegal immigrant. Of course, Arizona says a panel will make guidelines for this, and so we won't have to worry racial profiling. But of course, that assumes police can follow reasonable guidelines for anything... And police often have shown that they cannot.

Now, one might think this isn't a problem. However, a simple driver's license will not necessarily suffice in the eyes of Arizona, since AZ itself has often given licenses to illegal immigrants. So, basically, if you have any heritage of the hispanic/latino kind, you'd better carry your birth certificate on you at all times in Arizona.^[2] Failure to be able to prove it on the spot can lead to arrest and a $500 fine.

The other "lulz" this week from Arizona is a gem of a bill which will require Obama to show his birth certificate to appear on the 2012 ballot in Arizona.^[3] Nevermind the fact that he's already shown it to the people that matter most - the US Justice Department - or given a copy to the media - or had folks in Hawaii said the copy he gave matches the original - no, nevermind any of that at all! All of the stuff in my list doesn't count because Arizona is a special snowflake of a state, and they expect more from their Presidential candidates (the ones with funny names and dark skin, anyway).^[4]

Arizona, I leave you with these immortal words from Jon Stewart (to Fox News): Go fuck yourselves.

1. It became a law today, actually.
2. Providing your name isn't Obama, anyway... Then that won't even do.
3. Source
4. I wonder if they'll require McCain to show his when running for Senate? Can you even read his anymore, or is it like some ancient manuscript, indecipherable except to the eye of a seasoned archaeologist?

Patrick Swayze was MY favorite actor, too!

No, really, he was. I absolutely loved Red Dawn! Who didn't? And who could forget the epic fight scenes of Roadhouse? Or the love story of Dirty Dancing!? This man had it all. He was fantastic!

Actually, in all honesty, I didn't really care for him that much (or any of those movies). In fact, I cared for him so little that I'd never even say I cared for him just for the sake of insulting someone else.^[1]

On the other hand, some people would. Take, for example, this thing that's been going around on Facebook:

Dear Lord, this year you took my favorite actor, Patrick Swayzie (sic). You took my favorite actress, Farah (sic) Fawcett. You took my favorite singer, Michael Jackson. I just wanted to let you know, my favorite president is Barack Obama. Amen.^[2]

So, I get it, some people don't like Obama. About half the country doesn't like Obama. That's fine. They probably shouldn't wish for his death, but whatever. What really is remarkable here is the telltale signs of the kind of person that doesn't like Obama. Apparently, these people like bad music, pedophiles, and awful movies... Oh, and they can't spell.

Well, okay, maybe that doesn't really encompass all of them, but it's certainly hilarious that people are actually posting the above on Facebook! I mean, if you don't like Obama and you really want him to die, is it really worth having to - even falsely - admit that Michael Jackson was your favorite musician? I hated George W. Bush, but I would've never've said, "This year, God, you took Pope John Paul II from me. He was my favorite Pope. By the way, my favorite President is George W. Bush."^[3] I also wouldn't say, if they were to die tomorrow, "God, you took my favorite band from me, ICP. By the way, my favorite fat loser nerd in the entire world is my girlfriend's ex-boyfriend". No matter how much I wish for bad things to happen to that guy, I really just can't ever admit, even jokingly, to liking ICP. I would rather put a bullet up my nose and into my brain.

In short, they should be embarrassed about their bad taste. And, if they're just saying to try to be funny, then they should be embarrassed about their poor sense of humor. And, in any case, they should be embarrassed for not fixing the spelling errors.

1. Present blog entry is an exception. :P
2. Source
3. Actually, I don't like the Catholic Church, but JP² wasn't so bad. I was just making a reference to the pedophile scandals, as a strange analogous joke to the Michael Jackson thing.