SUE EVERYBODY!

Next time you are a victim of crime, just sue the police, folks. No, I'm not even kidding - go ahead, it's akin to what is happening in Connecticut.

A $100 million claim on behalf of a 6-year-old survivor is the first legal action to come out of the Connecticut school shooting

...

The unidentified client, referred to as Jill Doe, heard "cursing, screaming, and shooting" over the school intercom when the gunman, 20-year-old Adam Lanza, opened fire, according to the claim filed by New Haven-based attorney Irv Pinsky.

"We all know its going to happen again," Pinsky said on Friday. "Society has to take action."

...

Pinsky's claim said that the state Board of Education, Department of Education and Education Commissioner had failed to take appropriate steps to protect children from "foreseeable harm."

It said they had failed to provide a "safe school setting" or design "an effective student safety emergency response plan and protocol."^[1]

We all know that robberies happen every single day, as do burglaries, so why not sue the police? Clearly they know it's going to happen again. Society, and you, the crime victim, have to take action! 

And why stop at the police? Sue the the leasing company/landlord/real estate agent... That's not much more bizarre than what is going on here. No, wait, the DOE is named? Oh, then why not sue the construction company that built it, too!?

There's no end in sight! We could sue so, so, so many people! The people who made the door or window the person broke in through is responsible, too! And if the criminal walked across the grass, the groundskeepers in your community are responsible? If you don't have groundskeepers, why not sue the people who made the grass seed that grew the grass! And hell, that grass needed water, so sue the water company, too!

Surely, if you are robbed, the criminal(s) needed to get there somehow. Who made the car they used? Sue them! Sue the city/county/state for constructing the roads they drove on! SUE EVERYBODY!

And make sure, just to be sure, ask for an absurd sum... You're not doing it right if you don't.

1. Source