Entitled Parents FOR THE LOSE.

What entitled nonsense... Apparently school can't be cancelled because parents might actually have to... OMG... BE PARENTS!

I was reading an article in the Baltimore Sun today. It was about snow and snowdays, etc. And it contained a lot of griping parents complaining about their kids having snowdays and being "stuck at home with them". Well, guess what, folks, you had kids. OF COURSE snowdays are a possibility. When you kids, sometimes they're going to be off. What do these people do in the Summer? It really pisses me off to read about parents whining about having kids and having to actually be responsible for them for once. I have friends with kids. Guess what? They don't complain about their kids being off. They make the most of it and accept that it's always a possibility. These entitlement the parents in this article have reminds me of why I don't like most parents to begin with.

"Its pretty rough, really," said Lynn Bartolotta of Ellicott City, whose four children have been home - romping in the snow, bickering and occasionally crying - since Friday. Bartolotta was out from work with a case of laryngitis Monday and, as she watched her husband drive off to work, realized she would be alone with four kids and no voice.

The children have been enjoying the snow, but Bartolotta said she needs to quickly plan some day trips for next week. "When the snow is gone, we're going to be in big trouble," she said.

After four days, a mere fraction of the 15-day break coming to most area children, some little hands have already made mischief.

While waiting for a prescription at a Giant supermarket in Columbia on Tuesday afternoon, Sharon Shomette suddenly discovered that her 5-year-old daughter Cami's eyelashes had been snipped with a pair of scissors.

While Cami and Claudia, 6, protested their innocence, Shomette shook her head over the school system's decision to stay closed. "I think it's crazy" to cancel classes today, she said. "They're home cutting each other's eyelashes off."

"Our school is a walking school," Shomette said of Stevens Forest Elementary in Oakland Mills. "I'm out there driving my kids around on the roads. They're driving me crazy," she said, shooing Cami away from a beeping blood-pressure machine in which the girl had inserted an arm.

Lynn Bartolotta? I don't feel sorry for her at all. She chose to have four kids. So guess what, the possibility of getting stuck at home with them at some point should've crossed her mind before she had them. Do these people never think of this crap?

And what the fuck is with kids cutting each-other's eyelashes? Does this mother have no control over them? Sure sounds that way with the whole "blood pressure machine" debacle, too. How do these kids not kill one another all summer long?

Snow Days: They happen. If you're going to have kids and live in a place that it snows, accept it or SHUT THE FUCK UP. Things happen. Don't be a parent if you're not ready to accept all that comes with it.

1. Source

LEAVE MICHAEL VICK ALONE!

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2009/12/07/dnt.vick.protest.support.wgcl

This video has me laughing... At how stupid people can be when defending a "sports hero".

Michael Vick fans turn out in droves, defending his previous criminal activities and inviting him back to Atlanta. On the other side, anti-dog-fighting folks show up to protest him. Some Vick fans attack the protestors, spitting on them and destroying their signs.

It almost makes too much sense. Hmm, they defend a guy that is okay with dog-fighting, and they attack people who are demonstrating using their First Amendment right. This is outright criminal, but laughable. How stupid to you have to be to assault people because they don't like your ex-con sports hero?

My favorite of the bunch is probably the guy that said "This is a direct attack on his character". Well, so fucking what? He is a CRIMINAL. HE COMMITTED CRIMES. It'd be different if they had signs full of libelous claims. But no, they do not, they have THE TRUTH. That's not an attack on his character, it's simply stating fact.

Here's all I hear when they complain about the protestors:

"HE'S A HUMAN! What you don't realize is that Michael is making all of you and the NFL money and all you do is come out with mean signs, inslting him! LEAVE MICHAEL ALONE! You are lucky he even plays NFL, you BASTARDS! LEAVE MICHAEL ALONE... PLEASE! Leave Michael Vick alone... Right now! I mean it!"

But in the end, the assault and destruction of property proves on thing... Like Vick, they don't mind criminal violence. Nicely played, Vick fans, nicely played.

Too-fat-to-graduate? Or just the victim of an incorrect measurement of a healthy person?

(CNN) -- Most college students expect to receive their diplomas on the basis of grades, but at a Pennsylvania school, physical fitness matters too.

Students at Lincoln University with a body mass index of 30 or above, reflective of obesity, must take a fitness course that meets three hours per week. Those who are assigned to the class but do not complete it cannot graduate.^[1]

Okay, that's pretty straight-forward. I can see what they're trying to do - they're trying to improve the health of young Americans.^[2] That's commendable, I suppose. However, it's how they are going about it.

By using BMI as their basis for graduation (and what "healthy" means), they are using a flawed system to possibly de-grade people (Get it, de-grade? Because grades don't matter? And they're making them feel bad!). The measurement of BMI is a simple weight-to-height ratio. It does not take into account age, health, blood pressure, gentic conditions, or even muscle mass and body fat percentages. As such, it is completely flawed.

An example of what I'm talking about is myself. I'm overweight. My doctor tells me that I could stand to lose some weight, yet I am closer to a 30BMI than to a healthier one. I also have a lot of muscle mass in my legs and arms. I'm not "obese" at all, but yet my BMI is nearly obese. My doctor tells me all of the time that my healthy weight, based on my muscle mass, would be 10-15lbs less. Yet to get to a "healthy" BMI, I would need to lose 30lbs. In order to do that, I would not only have to lose a bunch of fat, but once I did lose that fat, I'd have to become anorexic and let my muscles atrophy.

Another (and perhaps better) example is a college friend of mine, Matt. He was over 6' tall, and pretty decently built. He didn't have six-pack abs or anything, but his stomach was smaller than mine by a long shot. His BMI was 32, which is over obese. By the rules of Lincoln, he'd have to take a fitness class, and I would not. But yet very feel people in the world would look at him and think "Wow, that guy needs to lose some weight", and I doubt any doctors at all would say it.

So, Lincoln University, while I see what you're trying to do, you're failing, hardcore. You need to use better methods of determining who is "unhealthy". BMI is not the correct method at all. It's an inferior method of determining health. If you're going to invade the privacy of students enough to find our their BMI, perhaps you should simply switch to testing them for body fat percentages.

Oh, but they solved that issue, apparently. By measuring somebody's waist.

Because BMI is not a perfect measure of obesity, students also have their waist circumference measured, he said. There are some people who have a high BMI because of their muscle mass, but are not actually obese, and the waist measurement is meant to weed out those people.

Again, an incorrect measure. I have a large stomach and chest cavity, which are 100% genetic. There is little fat to my stomach (a little bit at the bottom), but I have a large belly. My doctor has told me that there is no way to rid myself of this. So not only would my BMI be high, but my stomach as well. Luckily, my BMI isn't quite 30. But if it was 30, I'd be stuck taking a fitness course when other people are probably much more needy of it.

Why they can't simply measure bodyfat percentage, which is a much better measurement, is beyond me.

And while I'm on it, since when did anybody have the right to invade somebody's medical privacy? How can this university even know what somebody's BMI is? I'm not the only one that feels this way, either:

From a legal perspective, the school's requirement seems "paternalistic" and "intrusive," said David Kairys, professor of law at Temple University Law School in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

Maybe some wise, upstart student will fight the powers that be. I can't wait.

1. Source

2. Not the David Bowie song.

Gerry Jones (redux): Professional bullshit artist or the psuedonym for an anti-gay organization?

Thanks to a comment from a reader on the last post about Gerry Jones, I've found out that he is not what he pretends to be. You see, Gerry Jones is not from Baltimore. Or is he?

I question this because the commenter pointed out that they read the EXACT same letter in the Star Ledger in New Jersey, where Gerry Jones said he was from Trenton and not Baltimore.^[1] Now that makes me wonder if he's real at all, or if he simply writes the same hateful letter to every paper in the country and pretends to be from their area to make his opinion "more relevant" to the audience of the paper.

I also am considering that there is the possibility that it is a form letter from a national anti-homosexuality campaign with offices in several cities (so that the phone numbers match up to the given location when the papers call).

As it turns out, he's also from Columbus, Mississippi.^[2]

And Cadillac, Michigan (I think. I'm not sure, but it's a Detroit paper and his location is Cadillac).^[3]

And Orlando, Florida (he must be a REAL fan of Disney's gay day thing they do every year).^[4]

And Tacoma, Washington.^[5]

I am not going to post anymore, because I believe five demonstrates my point just fine, but if you want to play this game, you can do it all day long! Just Google "Gerry Jones" and "Hooray for pro-life and traditional family values.", and you'll find a ton of results from different papers, all listing his location as relevant to their paper. The papers themselves should be ashamed for falling for such a ruse.

So, Gerry Jones: Not just a scum-sucking douche bag... A lying, scum-sucking douche bag.

1. http://blog.nj.com/ledgerletters/2009/11/aarps_health_care_stance_can_g.html
2. http://www.cdispatch.com/opinions/article.asp?aid=3681
3. http://www.freep.com/article/20091107/OPINION04/911070307/1322/Kalamazoo-voters-head-in-right-direction-on-gay-rights-ordinance
4. http://mobile.orlandosentinel.com/inf/infomo?view=opinion_item&feed:a=sentinel_5min&feed:c=opinion&feed:i=50346549&nopaging=1
5. http://www.thenewstribune.com/opinion/letters/v-lite/story/943943.html

Dr. Gerry Jones (Or "How I Learned that Hateful Bigots are all Stupid")

The idiotic homophobes are coming out in force. Recently, we had a letter from a "Mary" (whose relatives are now attempting an e-battle with me, starting with insults from the get-go), and now we have Gerry Jones, noted doctor of anthropoly err... Uneducated dolt.

And I mean that when I say it. I didn't mean the "doctor of anthropology" part at all, but I figured since he wrote in a manner to suggest that he is some sort-of authority on the history of marriage and human sexuality in various cultures around the world, he must think he is some sort-of doctor of anthropology. But he's not. And do you know how I know he's not? Because the facts in his letter can easily be refuted by an Anthropology 101 book.

Hooray for pro-life and traditional family values!

I wish to congratulate the voters of Maine -- one of the most liberal states in the Union -- for rejecting the counterfeit and oxymoronic notion of "same-sex marriage."

Homosexual activists are hurting and broken people desperately seeking affirmation of an objectively deviant lifestyle. One that, even in their heart of hearts, they know to be wrong and a dead end. They remind me of spoiled children dressing up and playing house, refusing to come in when mom calls for dinner. The vote is significant because we are dealing with forced affirmation of homosexuality -- under penalty of law. This is an historic battle for the minds and souls of our children.

A dead-end? Does this mean that, because they cannot have children, it's a dead-end marriage and there is no reason for it? I sure hope this man goes around telling all of the sterile couples out there that their marriages a sham and a dead-end. I sure hope he tries hard to overturn their legality!

And you know, not only does this guy not have the simplest understanding of marriages and choices in society, he doesn't even understand the facts of how laws and freedom work. Nobody's forcing anybody to affirm homosexuality, the law would simply make the government affirm it. Everybody, including Gerry Jones, would still be free to be a bigoted, hateful idiot if the law passed.

Gay marriage has now lost in all 31 states in which the question has been put to a popular vote.

The time has come for a federal amendment banning homosexuality and same-sex marriage.

Gerry Jones, Baltimore^[1]

He wants to timewarp back to when homosexuality wasn't even allowed. Too bad the Supreme Court already found that sodomy was legal. Good luck overturning that one.

I'm glad he admits he's celebrating the "defeat" of gay marriage... Maybe he'll throw a party... With booze... And a freak accident will occur... And nobody of any intelligence will miss him.

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Violence: an acceptable family value.

You heard it here, first, folks. Well, okay, you might've heard it over on 9th Wonders (an unofficial Heroes fansite forum), but if you haven't, you're probably hearing it first from me, then.

Dear NBC

Heroes has been the favorite show of my wife and I from season 1 because it really is a fantastic drama. Recently the gay/lesbian topic has been introduced and I thought I should comment on this because not saying anything will never make a difference.

My wife and I believe in traditional family values and have struggled to find entertainment that will align with that. Heroes has been fantastic not only because of its intricate character cast and brilliant concept, but for my family it has been reasonably safe entertainment. We don't have to worry about whether or not we will have to turn off the TV mid show. Most every other show is not as entertaining or clean enough for the whole family to watch.

For the most part this show has been wholesome, which my family greatly appreciates, but I am very concerned about the direction this is heading. Even though my wife and I are huge fans of the show, we are concerned that we may be forced out of the target audience, which is a business decision i guess, and consequently have to quit watching.

I realize that not everybody shares my opinion, but many do. I am just tired of having it pushed on my family and I during every single show we watch. So, I just thought I should post and hope for the best before it is to far gone for the traditional family values audience.

I do not mean to offend anyone, this is just how I feel.

Your Loyal Viewer,
Atticus

P.S. My wife and I are in my early 20's in case you are wondering^[1]

What. The. Fuck?

A show that, at many times, glorifies violence is completely acceptable to this person under the guise of "family values", but hey, homosexual loving is just outright fucked-up?

Gosh, the things people get upset about these days. It's completely okay that people have superpowers and main and murder each other with them. What's wrong with television these days is THE GAYS!

The gays are ruining television, spitting on traditional family values and teaching kids bad things. What America needs more of is blatant, vapid superhero storytelling, teaching little boys that superbeings are real, and that they can be one, too... As long as they don't suck cocks.

Atticus: A true dumbass if I've ever seen one. And seriously, I've seen him... In my visions. I have powers, too.^[2]

1. Source
2. Sorry to let you men out there down, I'm not gay.

Mary had a little lie, little lie, little lie...

Oh, I don't know where to start with this, really, but I guess a good place is to simply post what this lady had to say:

Is everyone supposed to accept gay marriage now that a Ravens' linebacker and a few other players have put their stamp of approval on it ("Tackling homophobia," Oct. 8)? From the size of the article and the photo of Brendon Ayanbadejo, you would think so, but this is just one man's opinion.

The majority of people still think that marriage should be between a man and a woman. After all, that's the way it's been since the beginning of the human race. The special relationship between the sexes was and always will be essential to the survival of the human race. No amount of approval from athletes can change that.

Let gays and lesbians do their thing, but don't call it marriage. Can't they be creative and come up with a different name? Don't degrade marriage it by linking it to a lifestyle that most theologians and the Bible call immoral.

Mary F. Kollner, Baltimore

Here is a better question, in response to her first question: Is everybody supposed to disagree with gay marriage just because a 2000-year-old book says they should? From this woman's response, you would think so, but this is just one woman's opinion.

Why should religious dogma dictate society's laws? The majority of people of this world are not Christian, and while the majority of this country might be, that doesn't mean their religious dogma should dictate the lives of everybody else in it. If those people do not wish to accept gay marriage, then they do not have to have one.

Mary seems to think that marriage has to deal with procreation and she also suggests that it's been around as long as the human race. On the contrary, anthropologists and social-theorists who understand anything about the history of the institution could tell you that before marriage existed, the human race existed, propigated and repopulated. Not until society existed and permanent settlements became norm did marriage exist. Once society became interested in "I've got mine and you've got yours", an insurance policy against raising children not of your bloodline had to be invented: marriage.

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Zombies: The fall of our economy.

I'll admit to dressing up in funny clothes from time to time and participating in a bit of role playing. Sometimes it's fantasy based, and sometimes it's zombie-based. Yes, I have gone to zombie walks!

And, accordingly, as I have gone to zombie walks, I am one of the reasons our economy is so bad. Well, if you ask Frank Palizzolo of Baltimore, anyway.

During last month's zombie walk in Baltimore, Palizzolo came across the mass of zombies walking the streets of Baltimore, and here is what The Baltimore Sun wrote about it:

"This is why our economy" is in the tank, said an unsmiling Frank Palizzolo, waiting for a haircut and clearly disgusted by the unholy parade passing by. "People have nothing better to do than this, walking around like [jerks]? Why don't they get jobs?"^[1]

Wow. Apparently, people doing stuff that this guy doesn't like on a Friday night makes them jobless? Apparently, some people have nothing better to do than get a haricut on a Friday night. Maybe that makes him jobless. Or just a loser. Not sure.

But as for the actual point of this blog: What is this guy even talking about?

First of all, he simply assumes that they don't have jobs. This is an obviously poor assumption, considering this walk happened on a Friday night. By his logic, every person that goes to a bar or does anything at all on a Friday night doesn't have a job (or gets a haircut?).

The "if you aren't doing what I like, you don't have a job" fallacy has been around for decades. In the 60s, people used it as a disparaging comment towards those that protested the war.

The phrase made a great resurgence in this century thanks to the "War on Terror". I have been the victim of such a comment quite a few times (among other comments). Hell, once, myself and two others were told "YOU ALL NEED TO GET JOBS YOU HIPPIE LOSERS." The ironic part is that the two people I was standing with were college professors. So, not only did these two have jobs, but their jobs were to teach others how stuff so that they can get better jobs!

But, I digress on that point, as it is straying from the original point...

The largest problem with the economy right now is a lack of jobs, last time I checked. Therefore, even if the idiot known as Palizzolo were correct (and these people, indeed, did not have jobs), his point is still 100% mind-numbingly stupid.

How can the economy, where many are out of work due to a lack of jobs, be that way because some people don't have jobs? Someone oughta get back to me on that one.

Frank Palizzolo: The reason our economy sucks is because our country is full of idiots. You're one of them, and I am begging you to remove yourself from our gene pool.

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The new Wii Bowling game costs $4,000

Polk County, FL police officers raided a man's house, found drugs, then spent NINE hours playing Wii bowling. The search cost $4,000 to conduct (due to there being 16 people working the site), and everybody seemed to take turns bowling, including the supervisor.

Maybe if they had spent some more time searching a little better, they might've found the hidden camera that caught it all of the hardcore bowling action.

Idiots.

1. Video

Oh, Kevin Brady, you're so cute when you talk!

The Texas Republican [Sen. Kevin Brady] on Wednesday released a letter he sent to Washington’s Metro system complaining that the taxpayer-funded subway system was unable to properly transport protesters to the rally to protest government spending and expansion.

Brady wrote. “These participants, whose tax dollars were used to create and maintain this public transit system, were frustrated and disappointed that our nation’s capital did not make a great effort to simply provide a basic level of transit for them."^[1]

So, let me get this straight - a bunch of people show up to the capital to protest government spending and are angry that the government didn't spend enough on one area, apparently?

Brady tweeted from the Saturday march. “METRO did not prepare for Tea Party March!”

Brady says in his letter to Metro that overcrowding forced an 80-year-old woman and elderly veterans in wheelchairs to pay for cabs. He concludes that it “appears that Metro added no additional capacity to its regular weekend schedule.”

Yep, that's exactlywhat it seems like: People who came to protest government spending on programs were upset that a government-funded program didn't have enough money spent on it?

"HEY, BECAUSE OF YOUR UNDERFUNDING OF GOVERNMENT SPENDING FOR PUBLIC TRANSIT, I COULDN'T PROTEST YOUR GOVERNMENT SPENDING!"

Priceless. Absolutely... Priceless.

I mean, really, they operate on a normal schedule. Any time they add to the schedule, it costs a lot of extra money (due to overtime, etc). These people should understand this and be more supportive of them cutting costs if they really dislike government spending so much.

Kevin Brady, you remind me of my cousin's three year-old daughter: You say the damndest, cutest, nonsensical things. It's truly adorable, Kevin.

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Some might consider it a devil's pact...

I'm not one to argue for arbitrary ages on anything - driver's licenses, drinking, joining the military, or even the age of consent. I simply don't like applying arbitrary ages to things, as it is very much on an individual basis. However, the law must start somewhere, and thus they pick an age that seems most reasonable for a majority of people.

As we all know, there are some people who break such laws: Plenty of kids drink underage, some have lied about their age to join the military, and in pop-culture history, we have one Brian (Anthony Michael Hall in The Breakfast Club) who has a fake ID for the sole reason of voting. And, of course, there are plenty of pedophiles and ephebophiles that break age of consent laws on a daily basis.

Many of the people who break AoC laws end up in prison (or worse, in prison AND caught by Chris Hansen on television), but some get away with it. Many of the ones who are caught get turned in by the parents of the "victim". Sometimes, the parents let it go on for awhile and only turn the person in after something happens that they do not approve of, while other times, the parents turn in the perpetrator as soon as they find out.

But then, sometimes, there are those special parents that love their kids, look out for them, and wholly approve of their lifestyle and wishes parents like Tracy Lisi and another woman:^[1]

(Sept. 12) - Two New York mothers allegedly signed an agreement allowing one mom's 13-year-old daughter and the other's 19-year-old son to engage in a romantic relationship, police said.

The pact didn't impress the police.^[2]

The pact didn't impress the authorities? You don't say.

What in the fuck is wrong with these two idiots that they'd actually think that making a pact would protect their kids and themselves from legal repercussions?

Now, the mothers face charges of child endangerment and the 19-year-old, Shawn German, is charged with second-degree rape, among other offenses, according to a Times Union report.

"They put something in writing saying it was OK for those two to date," Schenectady, N.Y., Police Sgt. Eric Clifford told the newspaper.

How very nice and open-minded of both mothers! Progressive politics have really come a long way in New York. I eagerly await them passing a gay-marriage bill soon.

German's mother, Tracy A. Lisi, 38, and the girl's mother, whose name was not released to protect the privacy of her daughter, thought the agreement would provide protection "should the 13-year-old get pregnant," Clifford said.

First, what mother even thinks her 13-year-old should even be dating a 19-year-old, let alone having sex (as implied by the "pregnant" bit)? And even if they approve of it, or don't turn the 19-year-old in outright, who talks to the 19-year-old's mother and doesn't tell the woman, "Your son is a sick pervert that needs to date girls his own age", who actually talks to the mother and instead says "Hey, this is cool with me, let's make a pact and avoid the law!"???

You know what would provide really protection from legal repercussions? Never doing it to begin with.

Breakin' the law, breakin' the law: You've gotta work on your angle, moms.

1. Whose name is not being released due to privacy laws regarding the "victim".
2. Source

You'll Never Find a More Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy

In high school, I was a bit of a slacker - lots of kids were. And most of the time, I accepted the consequences, just like the other kids did.

Admittedly, there was a time when I was allowed to use a teacher's laptop, and I did use that chance to edit my grades in her grading program (as well as those of a few friends). But that is about as far as my grade modification ever went.

I know that some kids have attempted to bribe teachers in the past - it often makes news when they do (and I'm sure some get away with it). So, it really shocked me when I read this:

PATERSON, N.J. (Sept. 12) - Authorities say a New Jersey teenager threatened to rape and kill his teacher if she did not give his entire class an "A++" for the last school year.^[1]

The kid, who is 14-years-old, informed his teacher he would kill her and rape her family for good grades - and he didn't even negotiate properly! A++'s for everybody? That's not how you do it.

And really, you have to be a pretty stupid 14-year-old to think that you won't get caught for such an absurd attempt at extortion. After all of the teachers getting caught having sex with their students, and all of the students getting caught trying to bribe their teachers with money, death AND rape threats are NOT the way to go.

Oh, and he did it through e-mail. So not only did he make a stupid threat (and not go through with it, making him a sissy), he made a stupid threat and left some pretty damning evidence to it.

New Jersey: Such a cesspool of crime and corruption, even the kids are getting in on it.

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What Happens in Vegas Doesn't Stay in Vegas, As It Turns Out - WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, VEGAS?

Las Vegas, NV - Sin City, the only place in America where, if you have $1, you can't buy a McDouble. Well, if you're homeless, anyway.

LAS VEGAS -- A battle is brewing over a new Las Vegas ordinance that bans providing food or meals to the indigent at city parks.

The Las Vegas City Council unanimously passed a law, which went into effect Thursday, making it a crime to feed the homeless at city parks. It carries a maximum penalty of $1,000 and six months in jail. ^[1]

Wait... What? Apparently, it's now a vicious crime (of the misdemeanor proportion) to feed someone.

What if I go to Vegas and I don't want the rest of my food? I simply can't give it to somebody that needs it more than I do?

In a city with a rich tourism industry, I supposed that I can understand why they'd want to do just about anything to get rid of their "homeless problem". However, in a city with a rich tourism industry, if I'm spending money on food, why in the fuck is it the business of the law who eats it?

But, if that wasn't bad enough, the law also bans food being sold to homeless people:

The law bans giving away or selling food to anyone who could get assistance from official sources under state law, and officials said city marshals will get specialized training to enforce it.

So, as if it weren't bad enough that they're homeless, and some of them have too much pride to ask for help - if they ever have enough money to buy themselves food, they're actually not allowed to do so by law.

I can see it now:

Customer: "I'd like a double cheesburger, hold the mustard."

Employee: "Sorry, but as your shirt is a bit ratty, you smell like sweat and your jeans have holes in them, I'm not sure if I am legally allowed to serve you. Let me consult my trusty homeless-identification chart."

Customer: "What? I just wanted a fucking hamburger."

Employee: "I'm sorry sir, but as your shoes are over five years-old and your shirt has stains on it, the in-store chart identifies you as a homeless person. I cannot afford to lose my job or risk jail time, so I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

You know, I remember the last time people weren't allowed to buy food at certain places, according to the law - it was the 1950s.^[2] I also hear it kind-of sucked to be on the short end of that proverbial stick!

And, in the most damned hilarious thing I've seen in a long time, the mayor explains how they will identify the homeless:

The city’s mayor, Oscar Goodman, dismissed questions about how marshals will identify the homeless so that they can enforce the ordinance.

"Certain truths are self-evident," Goodman said. "You know who's homeless."

WHAT? I know there are a lot of homeless people in Baltimore, but I couldn't tell you who is or isn't. I wonder if I shared a sandwich with some dirty punk rock kid who was wearing an old, ratty t-shirt - would I be arrested because he "looks homeless"?

It really makes you think...

In related new, the article goes on to explain their overall position, which has involved arresting homeless people in parks - those that have too much "pride" to help themselves are considered mentally unhealthy and given "help".

Las Vegas: You're trying too hard.

1. Source
2. Well, okay, I don't remember it, because I'm not that old, but I recall hearing about it from people who were alive then.

What the fuck, McDonalds?

Apparently, McDonalds thinks it is the sole business of the world that is allowed to have "Mc" as part of its name.

Mc is no longer exclusive to McDonald's in Malaysia.

The fast-food chain lost an eight-year trademark battle to prevent a Malaysian curry restaurant from using the name "McCurry."

...

McCurry, which stands for Malaysian Chicken Curry, first opened in 1999 and serves dishes including fish head curry and breads including roti chanai and tandoori naan, according to the restaurant's Web site. Its logo is a chicken giving a thumbs-up sign. ^[1]

Apparently, making your name and actually having it stand for something while having it start with "M" followed by a "C" is wrong, because it is the sole proprietary rights of McDonalds.

What a silly corporation to attack such a lowly business simply trying to make it in the world. So what if they're called McCurry? In the lawsuit, they [McDonalds] claimed it infringed on their copyright as it could confuse consumers.

I'm not sure about Malay [the official language of Malaysian], but in English, at least, "McCurry" sounds nothing like "McDonalds", other than the "Mc" part.

And if that's not enough, their ownership and offense at people using "Mc" coupled with another word doesn't end in "consumer confusion" claims against supposedly-rival food outlets, as you can not read:

In 2003, Merriam-Webster defined the term "McJob" as "low- paying and dead-end work," which prompted a sharp response from former McDonald's Chief Executive Jim Cantalupo.

In an open letter to Merriam-Webster, Cantalupo said "your inclusion of the term "McJob", with its definition of "low paying and dead end work ", is not only an inaccurate description of restaurant employment, it's also a slap in the face to the 12 million men and women who work hard every day in America's 900,000 restaurants."

That's right, the [former] Chief Executive of McDonalds wrote an attack letter to Merriam-Webster, those awesome word people. Why? For the simple face that they put "McJob" in their dictionary and defined it in a way that might be demeaning the McDonalds (because nobody can ever demean such a might corporation).

Apparently, Jim Cantalupo doesn't understand that dictionaries tend to include words and define them as they are being used in a social situations. "McJob" has been a demeaning term in society and pop-culture (it's been in quite a few movies) waaaay before 2003.

In fact, in high school, as I remember it, we had to write a research paper for our final in Senior English (way back in the ancient days of 1999). The paper had to be about career we were interested in, and we had to describe the steps to becoming the thing we wanted to be. My teacher snarkily specified, "I want this to be about a real career, not a McJob."

Though, it's not just absurd Asian lawsuits and stupidly nasty letters to the wonderful wordsmiths at Webster's that McDonalds has given the world! As always, we get home-brewed, frivolous American lawsuits (and the Big Mac, who can forget that they've given us the Big Mac!?), just like any other sector of American life:

Other "Mc" suits include one against a motel with the name McSleep and McCoffee, a San Francisco Bay area espresso shop named after its owner, Elizabeth McCaughey.

Really? They're suing McCoffee, which is named after its owner? How's that going to work out? She's clearly not trying to confuse consumers (again, not that "McCoffee" has anything to do with or sounds anything like "McDonalds"). Her name really is "McCoffee". That's how you pronounce "McCaughey" - McCoffee.

Well, good luck with that McDonalds. Maybe next time I decide to come in for something, I'll order something with a side of corporate fascism.

McDonalds: Their new campaign is a ten year plan to sue most of Ireland.

1. Source

What the fuck, birthers? (redux)

I thought one little write-up was good enough for thos crazy "Birther" movement people. And it would've been, if some of their ilk hadn't outdone their previous efforts towards stupidity.

Ladies and gentleman, I give you the "Obama, show us your big black cock" movement:

Freerepublic

Apparently, if Barack Obama, as a Mr. Larry Sinclair has stated, is not circumcised, then he was not born in the United States. Therefore, Obama should show his penis to someone to have it examined to see if he's "cut".

You know, ignoring the completely ridiculously amount of stupid behind that (re: not everybody gets circumcised in the U.S.), there is a major legal issue having to do with medical privacy. You know what that reminds me of? That time these idiots wanted his birth certificate, but ran up against a legal issue involving a right to privacy in medical matters.

Seems like they just keep hitting the same wall... Over... And over... And over again.

We can only hope they start hitting actual concrete walls (concrete as in physical, not the substance - though, the substance would be fine) to the point that they:

A> die

or

B> Can no longer communicate

What the fuck, haven't you ever heard of satire?

I actually love the site "Christwire.org". The writing is so convincing most of the time (it does what The Onion used to do^[1]). In fact, the writing is so smart that sometimes, I find myself thinking it's real and having to remind myself that it's satire.

When I came across an article about the new World of Warcraft expansion that was announced Friday, I knew I had to find the "buzz" about it on the internet. My first goal was to find out how many idiots bought into the article, hook/line/sinker. So, first, I checked out the World of Warcraft forums, where I found a topic on it. I had found a goldmine, and I knew it.

The topic in question had 20+ pages of replies (20 replies/page). Not one of the more than 400 replies said "This is hilarious satire", or anything even remotely resembling "This is fake". In fact, most of them were pure outrage or people writing entirely-too-long "tl;dr" diatribes about how the article is wrong (and the site being a crappy site full of Christian-propaganda).

While reading that topic, I came across a post mentioning a similar post on "MMO-Champion" (a site that talks about MMO games - shocker, right!?). This obviously led me to MMO-Champion, where I searched for the topic. I quickly found it: another 8 pages of "OMG I'M SO OFFENDED".

The best part about a lot of the posts on either board are tha many people decided to ramble on, writing long, "intellectual" diatribes about how "stupid" and "unintellectual" the author of the article was. Most of these people also suggested that they were "much more intelligent than the author". Yep, the author is the stupid one here, apparently.

So, in closing, I would have to say that even though the article is not, in any way serious, I'm beginning to agree with it: World of Warcraft must be stopped. Perhaps if these people lived any lives outside of the game, they'd see the article (and the site in general) for what it is: Brilliantly-written satire that just trolled the fuck out of them.

1. You know, be subtle. That's what they did before the writers/owners decided that it should constantly be "over the top".

What the fuck "Hitler"?

I'll be the first to admit that I don't understand racial hate and discrimination on a very base level. Even moreso, I don't understand why it ever comes to the find of out-and-out hate whereas someone actaully feels the need to insult others using racially discriminating words.

And while I don't understand anything in the paragraph above, but have tried, I have never actually bothered to try understanding why anybody would think of Hitler as a rolemodel. Yes, neo-nazis are stupid as fuck. I can't see why anybody would think of a chickenshit that killed himself as a hero. I'm sure there are better modern heroes who died in a hail of gunfire or were arrested for things. Sure, Hitler killed millions of people, but when it came time to face his fate, he didn't die for the cause or become a martyr, he fucking killed himself like the chickenshit that he was.

So it pains me, fully, to hear that Calvin E. Lockner, recently arrested for an assault on an elderly African-American gentleman (which was completely racially motivated - there's no denying it) has a picture of Hitler tattooed on his stomach with the words "He Lives" underneath it. Oh, and he goes by the nickname "Hitler" (which is why the title is What the fuck "Hitler"?).

Calvin has a sordid history of crime: He's been charged with raping a woman and leaving her to die (and serving 8 years for it) and sexually assaulting a 4-year-old girl (woo, that's real superior stuff there from the master race), and for "biting his girlfriend's face during a discussion of black people" (paraphrasing from the papeR).

Now, good ol' Calvin (along with two teens) is being charged with attempted murder and assault, which is good.

When the police came to his door, he basically told them he "disliked people who were different from him" and told them that he was a white supremist. While that is completely ballsy to the point of being stupid, I have a feeling that he'll use it as evidence that he is criminally insane (which is how he got away with some of his earlier crimes - pleading criminal insanity). Who, in their right mind, would admit that stuff as soon as the cops came to the door? It's almost as if he were admitting to the crime and was proud of it. Oh, and I suppose having Adolf on his stomach with "He Lives" doesn't help - he might actually believe that he is the reincarnation of that chickenshit or something.

This all has given me a headache and made me very angry... I think tomorrow night I'm going to go see Inglourious Basterds - maybe it'll make me feel better.

Calvin Lockner: You are failing horribly at being the master race.

1. Sources: Baltimore police call beating of 76-year-old man a hate crime; Details emerge...; Two teens...;

What the fuck, George Deller?

August 7th, 2009
Bel Air, MD, a rotten cesspoll of idiotic conservative thought.

George Deller has just finished reading The Baltimore Sun. He threw it aside in disgust. "Oh, that's it! How dare they run this story in The Sun! I'm angry, and I'm going to write a letter. I'm hopefully going to be completely illogical, and I cannot wait for it to be published in the paper", George said to himself.

He sat down at his computer, and began typing. Soon, electrons were firing through its processors, while neurons in his head sat there, apathetically, refusing to fire. He began typing his letter letter, seemingly in agreement with the article:

"We're just like you," begins the article on the Sun's editorial page of August 7th. We then learn that the authors, a loving same-sex couple, are active in their faith community, work hard, pay their taxes, love to garden and bake and dance and laugh. But they are treated as second-class citizens in Maryland, separate and not equal because the state does not recognize their "marriage" contracted in Canada.^[1]

He read his first paragraph over, scanning it for errors. He sighed a sigh of relief, then excitedly shouted, "Excellent, this will really capture the attention of the pathetic liberal, equality-loving peaceniks! Once I've drawn them in, I can be completely irrational and prove my point! Muahahahahahaha!"

He thought about how to continue his letter for a few seconds, then continued typing.

He furiously began typing the next paragaph, his fingers moving faster than his brain (which, admitted, isn't a hard - perhaps a slug could do better). "Why should two loving, comitted, consenting adults be denied the same rights that accrue to heterosexual couples? Why indeed?", he wrote.

He thought to himself, "Perhaps I can call their arguments well-reasoned and logical as a joke. Only I'm capable of such logical reasoning", while typing the rest of his paragraph. He soon finished it, and was proud of his work:

Their logical, reasoned arguments have convinced me and I am going to write to my state representative and ask that he introduce legislation to end discrimination against any and all consenting adults who wish to enjoy the practical protections of marriage. Maybe he could call it "the Same-Sex/Incestuous Marriage Act of 2009."

He sent it off to his best friend and mentor to read it over. His friend, who was busy organizing the local KKK rally, quickly read it over and wrote back: "Two thumbs up - would read again!"

George read his entire letter again and then remarked to himself, "Perfect! I mocked the hell out of their stupid reasoning and brought up my own totally-valid reasoning as to why this is a terrible idea."

He read the last line over and over again, and thought aloud, "Someone might call it a slippery-slope argument, but I'm not even sure what that is, so who cares?"

Since he wasn't sure what a slippery-slope argument was, and didn't think it really mattered if he had made one, he continued in the same vein for the last paragraph, finishing up his hate-filled speech with this gem:

Yes, that's it exactly. Let's end not only the discrimination directed at consenting homosexuals but also that directed at the loving mother who wants to marry her (adult, consenting) son or the brother who wants to marry his (adult, consenting) sister. Let's just redefine marriage as the union of any two loving, comitted, consenting adults. Yes, I'm sure that will put everything right and make ours a more just society. As the sign the the photograph says, "Civil Marriage is a civil right." Yes, I think I'll get started on that letter right now.

After he hit the period key for the last time, he clicked "send" and the e-mail shipped itself off to The Baltimore Sun, where many were able to read it and laugh.

George, having felt accomplished, decided to call up his care taker and have them take him out for the day. You see, George is mentally handicapped, and incapable of any rational thought or judgment, let alone taking care of himself.

George Deller: Okay, so maybe he's not actually retarded, as that would be an insult to the mentally handicapped. But something tells me this guy has never had an intelligent thought in his entire life.

1. Source

What the fuck, Georgia?

I've always said that the "dirty south" could use some cleansing - not of the ethnic type so much, but of the racial type: the entire human race.

It should be well-known by now to News of the Weird readers that a DNA test disproving fatherhood will not necessarily relieve a man of child-support obligations. Frank Hatley's case is especially alarming. He was finally released in July in Cook County, Ga., but only after having spent 13 months in jail because he had missed a few payments for another man's child. Hatley had paid conscientiously, albeit incompletely, from 1987-2000, out of meager wages, and continued (even during periods of unemployment and homelessness) for several years after he learned he was not the father. In 2001, a court absolved him of the duty to make future payments, but the state interpreted that ruling as not affecting the overdue amounts from the past, and in 2008 jailed him. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution, 7-14-09]^[1]

So this guy, who wasn't even the father, was nice and payed child support even when he was homeless. It was later found out that he wasn't the father, and thus didn't have to pay anymore. And for some reason, Georgia state officials decided that he should go to jail for not paying for something he didn't even legally owe.

WHAT THE FUCK?

How can they even consider that to be a valid reason to jail someone? If anything, the state, or the woman, should be paying the guy back all of the money he didn't owe to begin with.

I can only hope this guy is smart and gets a good lawyer and sues the shit out of the state of Georgia, making them feel stupid and putting them in their place so something this mind-numbingly stupid doesn't happen to anybody else.

Georgia: Tough on deatbeat dads, even the ones who pay for somebody else's "little squirt".

1. Source (temporarily only)

What the fuck, WoW-playing douchebag?

I have, in the past, played the massive multiplayer online role playing computer game, "World of Warcraft". I have also often mused that, if the player base represents real-life society (which it likely does), then we're "fucked".

A kindred soul who also is interested in maliciously laughing at idiots led me to a post, from the World of Warcraft forums, where somebody describes a new game feature as segregation. Boy did I laugh out loud for about 60 seconds, all while smacking my head against my desk.

Before going into the post, I'll give you a little background, for those that are not WoW-inclined:

In WoW, one can level their character up to level 80 through adventuring and killing things. Since the games inception, there have also been "battlegrounds", which involve players killing other players (who are from the opposite faction) in a level bracket (10-19, 20-29, etc). For a short time, these battlegrounds also gave you experience points, helping you get to the pinnacle of leveling (60 back then).

They (Blizzard, the makers of WoW) took the experience points system out of the battlegrounds not-too-long after the game's release. Since then, people have been "twinking", which is the act of reaching level x9 (19, 29, etc) and then getting the best equipment you can, including enchants and all sorts-of other stuff that aren't available to the average player who is just trying to level to 80, basically making them invincible compared to normal players. Because of this, twinks basically, at times, made it unfun to play in battlegrounds.

Due to many complaints over the years, Blizzard finally did something about it: They re-introduced experience points in the battlegrounds. But, to not lose "twink" customers, they gave people the ability to turn-off experience-grain in battlegrounds. The only catch was that, if you turn off the XP gain, you have to play in a battleground with other people who have done so. So, now, twinks can only fight other twinks, no longer being able to proverbally "rape" normal players.

Apparently, this is a problem, because a lot of twinks don't feel like doing it, so they've given up twinking. Because of that, twink battlegrounds rarely get enough players to begin a match. Many twinks have complained about it, but this guy takes the cake:

I don't mind fighting only exp locked people but if you are going to segregate us like black people pre 1950's then give us a chance for all of us to play together like Compton. I don't mind slumming it up with my twink brethern but placing us in internment camps and making it unplayable is retarded.^[1]

Yes, folks... Apparently, making the game fun for normal players and making things more fair (and trying to keep the twinks happy by letting them still twink) is JUST LIKE SEGREGATION. JUST LIKE IT!

Later on, this same idiot says it's like the Jews being rounded up in World War II. But don't worry, he means no offense, because he had Jewish and German relatives, so he understands both sides of that conflict! Personally, though, I wouldn't mind if it were like the rounding-up of the Jews. That's right, you heard me: Round up all of the WoW twinks and execute them! Leveling characters are the master toons!

So, to recap: Making a game fair and trying to keep all players happy by giving some of them special servers because of their choice is just like rounding up people because of their race (and possibly killing them), something that they never choose to be!

Right.

Oh, and for bonus stupid: The guy claims he doesn't like to kill regular players and he just enjoys fighting other twinks, but his name is "Domination" (with some weird D character, actually, but whatever).

Domination: Overreacting to video games since 2001.^[2]

1. Source
2. I figure there's no way he's over 13, and probably wasn't too interested in video games until he was 5. But hey, I could be wrong... Dumb people come in all shapes, sizes, and ages.

WTF, Daniel Rozak?

Daniel Rozak is a man often referred to as "your honor", which is something I refuse to do.

I don't refuse to call him "your honor" or even include his title of "judge" before his name because I'm an asshole who wishes to disrespect authority, but because he really doesn't deserve it. The title of "judge" implies someone with good judgment - which he doesn't. And, in that same vein, calling someone "your honor" implies that you honor him - which I don't.

I don't make it a habit to go around, non-chalantly disrespecting authority figures (probably because I haven't been 12 in a very long time). However, this guy definitely, 100%, no-doubt-about-it, deserves my complete and total disrespect. A good term to use in his court room would be "your honorable ass" or maybe "your dishonor", because that's what he's done to himself recently - completely dishonored himself with idiocy, and here is why:

(Aug. 10) -- As Clifton Williams sat in the courtroom in Joliet, Ill., awaiting his cousin's sentencing on drug charges, little did he know he would soon be the one in jail.

As Judge Daniel Rozak sentenced Williams' cousin to two years probation, Williams yawned, an act that earned him six months in jail on contempt charges, the Chicago Tribune reported.^[1]

A guy yawned during a courtroom proceeding, and now he's in jail. Wow. Yawning, as proven by a few studies (and the television show Mythbusters) can be completely involuntary. Perhaps somebody else yawned, or the guy thought about the word "yawn" (hell, I bet someone reading this just yawned - but not from boredom, I hope).^[2] In any case, yawning is hardly a reason to be held "in contempt", and especially not for six months.

Maybe Daniel Rozak is correct, maybe Mr. Williams really did do it on purpose, but somehow I don't see how he should be charged with Contempt of Court, and receive the MAXIMUM SENTENCE ALLOWED BY LAW for such charges.

So, to recap: One yawn can get you the same penalty as somebody that stands up and tells the judge to fuck off. What an amazing courtroom Rozak must be running there. Was he, by any chance, born and raised in Texas? Or the 1600s?

Daniel Rozak: Your judgment has failed.

1. Source
2. I yawned reading the original article.

What the fuck, President Banda?

Chansa Kabwela did her civic duty and her job as a newspaper editor: she reported the facts. She repoted the facts not only to the public, but to the people "in-charge" - those that could actually do something to alleviate a perceived problem.

But now, Chansa Kabwela can do that no more. Chansa is in prison for distribution of pornography.

Chansa was once the editor of The Post, a Zambian newspaper. As it turns out, apparently, Zambia has had a healthcare workers strike recently. The Post, doing its job has reported on this. Chansa, apparently attempting to be a responsible human, took it upon herself and went one step further by sending pictures of the health-care horrors to Zambia's Minister of Health and its Vice President (among others).

So far, so good - we have a woman doing her job and trying to help her country out. And none of this would be a problem in this country, I imagine. However, in Zambia, it's a huge problem.

And what exactly is the problem with any of this? Apparently, some of the photos depicted women giving birth in parking lots and other non-hospital-type places. President Rupiah Banda found these photos to be obscene, branded them as "pornography", and demanded that Ms. Kabwela be arrested.

And so, she was.

Well, fuck! I'm not sure about the rest of the world, but I can never resist looking at a picture of a woman giving birth, pulling my pants down and furiously rubbing my erect penis!

Oh, wait, that's not right... What I meant to say is: I can't even think of a time that I have ever had an erect penis while seeing anything involving child birth. And I don't think most other guys get-off to such things either.

So, where does this leave us? Well, either President Banda has some really odd kinks, or the overall sexual mores of his country are far too repressive as they are attempting to censor valid medical photographs.

But let's not leave the buck at President Banda (though, to be fair, the buck WOULD stop there, as he is The President), because there is also Kenneth Ngosa, of which the article said the following:

One of the first witnesses, Kenneth Ngosa, a senior private secretary to the vice president, told the court he was immediately disturbed by the pictures he found inside the letter, according to the paper.

He was disturbed? Well, I sure as fuck hope so! I'd be distrubed, too, if the healthcare in my country ended up in such a bad state that women were having to, on a regular basis, give birth on an asphalt slab where I sometimes park my automobile.

Unfortunately, however, that's not why Mr. Ngosa was disturbed, or why anybody involved was disturbed! In fact, if that were the reason that these people had been disturbed, I wouldn't be writing this, because Ms. Kwabela would never have been arrested.

In closing, Zambia has not only failed healthcare, but they've failed at understanding that the real obscenity here is what's going on, not what is pictured in the photographs.

President Banda: President's a hard job and all dude, and your country's got quite a few problems. But you know what? Instead of arresting a lady trying to bring attention to them, it might be more helpful to actually solve those problems.

1. Source

What the fuck, Key Bank?

Jim Nicholson: Hero, criminal-catcher, unemployed...

Why? Because Key Bank has a policy - one they refuse to budge on, even if a guy is a fucking daytime superhero vigilante.

SEATTLE (Aug. 22) -- A Seattle bank teller has lost his job because he ran down a would-be bank robber and held him until police arrived. Jim Nicholson, 30, who had worked for more than two years at a Key Bank branch near the Seattle Center, says he understands the bank's strict policy that employees comply with robbery demands and avoid confrontations.^[1]

But he told The Seattle Times that instinct took over when a thin man in a beanie cap, dark clothing and sunglasses pushed a black backpack across the bank counter on Tuesday and demanded money.

Nicholson threw the bag to the floor, lunged toward the man and demanded to see a weapon. The man bolted for the door with Nicholson in pursuit.

He chased him several blocks before knocking him to the ground with the help of a passer-by. Nicholson then held the man until police arrived.

On Thursday, Nicholson was fired. Key Bank spokeswoman Anne Foster declined to comment on Nicholson and his actions.

...

"They tell us that we're just supposed to comply, but my instincts kicked in and I did what's best to stop the guy," he said. "I thought if I let him go he would rob more banks and cause more problems."

So what? That works for most people, but for some people, that's not the right thing to do. And, when adrenaline kicks in, rationality and "what my boss said" go right out the door. This guy is a hero, not somebody that should be unemployed.

Police and the FBI discourage such heroics. Bank tellers are trained to get robbers out the door quickly and are advised against possibly escalating a situation over money that's federally insured.

...

Seattle police Sgt. Sean Whitcomb said the best course for citizens is to be good witnesses to crimes.

"When confronted by a violent criminal, it is best to comply unless they feel their personal safety is in jeopardy. It is possible that taking action and confronting the criminal may lead to the injury of the victim or other bystanders."

"You want tellers to be proactive, but you want them to do it safely," said FBI Special Agent Fred Gutt.

For years, citizens have been "proactive" and good witnesses to violent crime. Look at where that's gotten us. Now, one guy stands up and does the right thing and he loses his job over it.

Furthermore, this guy wasn't a "violent criminal". He was simply a guy who walked into a place and demanded money. He didn't even show a weapon. Why shouldn't you beat the crap out of him for that stupid robbery attempt?

Nicholson said he has run after shoplifters while working at other retail jobs.

"It's something I almost look forward to. It's a thrill and I'm an adrenaline-junkie person. It's the pursuit," he said.

This guy is, apparently, a chronic hero. He obviously has some sort-of adrenaline issue. I am thinking that they are discriminating against him and his handicap. They should not have fired him, and if they should've done anything at all, they should've commended him because he clearly has an awesome "handicap" that makes him have to run after bad guys and beat the crap out of them. Any employer that cash should be happy to have this guy working for them.

Jim Nicholson: He's the goddamned Batman of the retail world.

1. Source

WTF, local racists?

I woke up at a normal time this morning. I realized I had little to do, so I offered to helped my father put in a stone patio.

Ignoring the heat and humidity, it was a pretty simplistic job, I'd have to say. We finished "installing" the 20 bricks in about 3.5 hours (including sitting-around-and-drinking-beer time). As a nice gesture for my help, he decided to take me to dinner at my second-favorite local Chinese buffet (well, we went by the other one, but it was packed).

This place was really nice when it was first built, but has gone downhill over the years, both because of of the neighborhood and the shopping center itself, and its customer base simply not caring about anything. The new buffet that opened (my favorite, now) has been taking customers away, and I'm sure that doesn't help at all, either.

Over the years, quite a good amount of graffit and gang tags have been drawn in the bathroom. Most of it is inane, but some of it is interesting. After years and years of random graffiti, some dumb white person got it in their brain that adding to the overall inanity of the graffiti was a wise idea, so they wrote "Fuck niggers and chinks".

I saw that a over a year ago. I took a black marker to it back then.

Fast-forward to present day:

I went into the bathroom. I noticed that plenty more had been drawn/written on the walls. Most-notably, something had been added somewhere near where the still-blacked-out "Fuck niggers and chinks". The new bit of idiocy was "This is a nigger buffy".

Yes, a nigger buffy. Don't fret, though, folks, these white people aren't really all that stupid: They realized their mistake! To make amends for this misspelling, they crossed out the "y" and added an "e". Yes, folks, Jade Garden Buffet now a nigger buffe.^[1]

I did some research, and as it turns out, Dictionary.com defines nigger as one of several things, the most important to this conversation being the second such definition in the second entry:

Slang: Extremely Disparaging and Offensive. a person of any race or origin regarded as contemptible, inferior, ignorant, etc.

Yes, the person who cannot spell buffet - a word they just walked by about ten different times when entering and walking around the restaurant - is apparently implying that someone of another race is an ignorant person. This makes sense.

Local racist assholes: Keep it classy and intellectual!

1. A picture

WHAT THE FUCK, USMC?

I know I said I'd only post here once a day, but the article which I just finished reading, I cannot resist posting here a second time today. It'll probably more-than-make-up for the fact that I will likely not post sometime this weekend, as I will be quite busy.

And now, without further ado, on to the bitch-fest...

Joshua Fry, a 20 year-old Marine, is, right now, in a military lock-up facility. He, at current time, faces charges for "possessing child pornography" and having "unexplained absences".

Joshua Fry, it would seem, at first glance, is a criminal. However, don't get too riled up just yet over this, as all of the facts are not in. Joshua Fry is, as it turns out, a young man with a history of being abuse and neglect. Oh, and did I mention that he's autistic?

Yes, folks, the military has not only recruited, but sent to boot camp - AND ALLOWED TO BE ON ACTIVE DUTY - an autistic person.

Oh, and before we go any further with this, let me add this little tidbit: THEY RECRUITED HIM FROM A GROUP HOME FOR DEVELOPMENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE!

Fry's backstory (from an abc.com article):^[1]

Fry was born in 1988 to a crack addicted father and a mother on heroin according to his lawyer's 35-page court motion to dismiss the charges, which was later rejected. The document details a downtrodden life that included physical and possible sexual abuse all while Fry slipped further behind in his developmental progress.

By the age of 3, according to the motion, he tested as having an IQ of 70 and was found to be anti-social and self-abusive. He was diagnosed with autism when he was 3 and then again as a teenager.

While in high school Fry was arrested for suspected larceny of iPods and found to have a knife. The charges were eventually dismissed and Fry was sent to what the motion describes as a "lockdown facility for youths" in Colorado to finish high school and receive treatment and counseling.

It was during this time that his legal guardian, grandmother Mary Beth Fry applied for and was granted temporary conservatorship over her grandson, the court noting that Fry, then 18, lacked the capacity to fully care for himself or enter into contracts on his own behalf.
After leaving the Colorado facility, Fry took up residence at a group home in Irvine, Calif., where he was living until his enlistment.

An assessment in 2006 by a licensed psychiatrist who treated Fry for two years noted that while the young man was high-functioning for a person with autism "he appears quite limited in his ability to think ahead of possible consequences."

That foreshadowing seemed to come true once Fry got to boot camp on Jan. 14, 2008.

"Immediately it was clear to Fry that he could not keep up with the day-to-day pace of boot camp," the motion argued. "Several times Fry informed his staff that he did not want to be a Marine. Each time he was told that was not an option."

First off, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE? How many people had to FUCK UP to miss this?

Secondly, how can they reject his lawyers motion to dismiss charges? This guy is clearly disabled and should be supervised, as he cannot function as a normal part of society on his own.

So, to recap: The United States Marines recruited someone who should most definitely not be trusted with a weapon of any sort. They then ignored his pleas to leave boot camp. Finally, they neglected to give him the extra supervision someone like him needed, and now, to top it all off, they're charging him with crimes.

Here's what I think:

If a recruiter hadn't taken him from the group home...

If the folks at boot camp would've listened to him...

If ANYBODY WITH AN IQ HIGHER THAN HIS WOULD'VE NOTICED THAT HE DIDN'T BELONG IN THE MARINES AND, IN FACT, NEEDED TO BE SUPERVISED, he wouldn't've likely been in possession of child pornography to begin with.

The Marines: Failing hard at recruiting... Both in numbers and quality.

1. http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=8080064&page=1

What the fuck, Lois and Judy? Your special snowflakes can just be like the rest of us and go to public school...

For years now, private schools have been going downhill. Sure, plenty of kids attend them with great marks. However, it's the curriculum that's been suffering. In the inner cities, this isn't too bad, because the kids are likely still getting a better education (or at least, an education in a less-disruptive atmosphere) than at a public school. However, in the suburbs, this is becoming a problem.

So, you can't imagine my recent bought of JOY when a local Catholic school (Towson Catholic) announced that it was closing its doors for good. I smiled, especially, because I have never met anybody that has attended this school whose knowledge impressed me. In fact, a lot of the people I've talked to whom attended this school we're down right stupid when it came to a quite a few subjects. However, since my joy isn't the main purpose of this diatribe, I will digress on this matter.

The school, after years of financial troubles, a fall enrollment down by 77 students (240 to 163), and a $650,000 budget shortfall, closed at the end of June.^[1] Understandably, many parents were upset about this, as they now only had two months to enroll their precious snowflake children in other private schools (because they're too good to attend school with the real people of society). Many have likely already enrolled their snowflakes in a new school. However, two parents, Lois Windsor and Judy Messina, have decided that the school cannot close, as it is a breach of some sort-of unwritten contract.

The lawsuit they have filed, according The Baltimore Sun, is asking for a temporary restraining order, which will force the school not only to remain open, but to keep all of its staff on the payroll.^[2]

Judy Messina's husband apparently suffers from pancreatic cancer, and the school was helping pay her daughter's tuition, which is why she is part of the lawsuit. Apparently, the school is breaching the unwritten contract they made, which is a promise to pay for the girl's tuition.

So, let me get this right: School is short $650,000 and is forced to close. Many parents enroll their children in other schools because of this. Meanwhile, two dumb bitches who can't stand to see their "special snowflake" children go to other schools (one of them would likely have to send their kid to a public school - OHNOES!) sue the school to not ONLY stay open, but to keep its current staff members.

So, in the end, the school, which was already short $650,000, is probably now short a bit more due to having an even lower enrollment for the fall due to students being enrolled elsewhere because of its "closing", might be forced to stay open (if these dumb bitches get their way) with an even larger budget shortfall. Oh, and they can't let any staff members go.

HOW THE FUCK ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO PAY THE SALARIES OF THE TEACHERS? I MEAN, FUCK, PRIVATE SCHOOLS ALREADY LACK THE PROPER FUNDING TO HAVE BOOKS THAT WERE WRITTEN IN THE LAST EIGHT YEARS... AND THIS ONE COULDN'T AFFORD TO PAY ITS TEACHERS TO BEGIN WITH... AND THEY WON'T BE ABLE TO LET ANYBODY GO (EVEN THOUGH THEY WON'T LIKELY NEED AS MANY STAFF MEMBERS IF THEY WERE ALREADY DOWN 77 STUDENTS *BEFORE* THEY CLOSED).

Lois Windsor and Judy Messina: Two people that don't understand budgets or simple economics. Perhaps two prime examples of why our economy is failing miserably.

1. http://www.baltimoresun.com/features/bal-md.fa.towson16jul16,0,5045219.story
2. http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/education/bal-md.suit16jul16,0,3110222.story

What the fuck, Wondering?

This morning, I did as I always do, I read the comics in the local paper. On the page next to it is the horoscopes and the "Ask Amy" column. I read the horoscopes because I generally find the nonsense amusing.

I often read "Ask Amy", as well, because she seems to generally offer sane advice to people with sometimes stupid questions that should have obvious answers. Generally, the people writing to Amy amaze and amuse me with their profound lack of understanding of what are often simple concepts of ettiquette and social interaction.

However, today's writer didn't amuse me at all. In fact, she left me quite incensed:

Dear Amy: I am 44, and my daughter is 23.

She is gay, and I have treated her and her partner the same way I treat my son and daughter-in-law. Everyone acknowledges this. I respect their commitment to each other and am joyful that they are very happy.

However, I cannot accept the fact that she just got "married." She has now informed me that she needs to terminate her relationship with me because I will not accept her marriage.

She is aware of my position on gay marriage. The suggestion to agree to disagree is not an option. What say you?

- Wondering

Link

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? This dumb woman refuses to support her daughter's lifestyle - one that she didn't choose and she can't change - and she wants to know how she can make her daughter like her?

Well, here's how you do it: You shut the fuck up and don't talk to your daughter anymore... OR A HEALTHY ALTERNATIVE: Learn to be more fucking accepting. It's not rocket science, lady!

So, to recount: This woman doesn't support her daughter's marriage, doesn't believe it's real, and doesn't even wish to accept that her daughter is gay, because she finds it morally wrong. And yet, somehow, she manages to think it's wrong of her daughter to push her out of her life. Well, you can't expect your daughter to accept your bigoted bullshit if you can't accept her the way she was born. Oh, and in case you forgot, you gave birth to her.

Luckily, there is a woman named Amy to set her straight.